The Babysitter: Killer Queen – Movie 5 in 31 Days of Horror

Thanks, I hate it.

I enjoyed the The Babysitter when it came out. Watching that movie, I felt like “wow, I would definitely give my soul for Samara Weaving’s Bee.” She was funny, she was charming, she was cool. This movie…was none of those things.

I watched the original with my sister, so we synced up a viewing of the sequel to watch “together” and we’d drink every time someone got murdered. We ended up desperate for any rule to add to the game, any excuse to drink as a coping mechanism for the movie we were watching.

At first our texts were tame. Ha ha, why is the silly boy wearing corduroy? Very silly.

I get he’s supposed to be awkward but it was a 3-piece corduroy suit.

Then we got steadily more impatient, but figured the arrival of the first movie’s cast implied the murder would arrive with them.

If the character has a name beyond “shirtless guy”, I don’t want to know.

I want to take this opportunity to note that Robbie Amell genuinely cracks me up in these movies, as he seems self-aware about the camp factor. His delivery of “I’m not even mad, bro” at the end is A+, and his intro in this movie (Cole turning around and smacking into his abs) is spot on. But he certainly doesn’t save this movie from itself.

Things start getting desperate. A female character is like “oh that’s from Terminator 2. One of the four sequels in cinema history to supersede the originals.” I cringed so hard I thought I was going to die. I don’t know if that’s an exact quote. I refuse to check. A piece of me died listening to it the first time.

Truly, truly desperate.

Also? A character gets accidentally peed on. Like on her face. And she’s not mad. She just leaves it. For the rest of the movie. I could not let this go.

Cool girls watch T2 and don’t care about basic hygiene!!!!

Lastly, and SPOILER ALERT, the one bright spot was that Samara Weaving does show up for a little at the end. Cool of her to come back for a sequel that never deserved her, we stan a scream queen!!!

Samara Weaving, the only thing we approve of.

Anyways, I hope the actors at least got a nice Netflix paycheck for this one.

Random musings:

Did they call this Killer Queen just to play the song at the end? I’m pretty sure they only called this Killer Queen to play the song at the end.

Also this is how desperate we got:

Don’t judge us. Judge the movie.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: